I haven’t been able to gather my thoughts to Blog until today. When I return to Haiti, while everything looks the same and smells the same and feels like the despair I left, it still takes time to let all that pass and wait for the “realness” that keeps me coming back.
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It’s always a wonderful reunion to see the employees here at New Life who I love so much and who work so hard day after day. I didn’t even go see the children at the orphanage the first night – too exhausted to have such an emotional experience.
Yesterday –being the first full day was a total joy. I hate to report, to all my mid-west friends and family, the weather can’t be more beautiful – a constant light breeze with temperatures only in the 80’s. A sheet is actually needed at night with NO fan – can you imagine?
Seeing Rene’, Frentzy and Fedner was so exciting as they never leave my heart when I am home. We had a great chat. There was another man who joined us and they asked many questions about the United States. I explained what the recession has done to our country and the prejudice that exists toward so many different races and for the various reasons. It was quite interesting to explain to them what it means to have your home/car repossessed. It was a concept they couldn’t imagine. Of course – they don’t know what a loan really is – or what it means to file bankruptcy when you have SO many nice things.
They didn’t realize the level of crime, murders, drug addictions, and homeless we have. They didn’t know what a random drive by shooting was – or that gangs just fire at people to show their power and many times innocent people including children are killed. I found the more negative things I described the more aware I became of how broken our country is, too. I think they even started feeling thankful that they lived in Haiti – maybe for the first time. I told them about the millions of people who don’t believe in God in the U.S.…but DO believe on getting more and more and more trying to find happiness - only to find it doesn’t last for any length of time, especially when they meet someone with more than they have. They shook their heads in amazement. Of course they experience this, too – but to a level WE wouldn’t understand. For example – if you have BEANS in your rice vs. just rice – you have a better meal. And if you just have cornmeal – you are really eating like a peasant. Then there are the people in the mountains where I was in October – who would walk miles just to have a meal of cornmeal. Isn’t life crazy? As a human race – it doesn’t matter where we live or the color of our skin or the language we speak we ALL have the same flaws of judgment, jealousy and greed – only we each think it’s only apparent in others – not ourselves, or surely not at the same level.
Rosena is the little girl I felt such an attraction to and knew she was pointed out to me for a reason at one of our clinics in the Pestel area in October. I couldn’t wait to see her. I knew she wouldn’t remember me, as she is only two years old. When I found her, she was asleep in her crib. I stared at her as I did the day I left. Unexpectedly, tears came to my eyes – as they are as I write this. What will happen to this dear child who has stolen part of me? I checked on her for several hours – STILL sleeping. When I returned after dinner I spotted her. I walked her way and when she saw me she ran to me and I scooped her up and with her tiny little hands she patted my back over and again. While I’m not SO naïve to think she had a clue who I was, I felt God had her console me and remind me that HE has her covered and I can lighten up a bit of my ongoing concern for her. In October, she was basically sick, shy and frail, so I never got to experience her personality. Well – she is so precious that I couldn’t take in all of her antics, laughs and mumbles in Creole which I so wished I could understand. She had on little outfit that had a very tiny pocket. I peeked inside and found what looked like a checker. She quickly grabbed it away from me and tucked it carefully away in her pocket. Then she held her tiny little hand over the pocket as if it was a precious jewel that she clearly wanted for her very own. It took all I had not to sneak her into my room and hide her in my covers – her and about 10 more. The blessing is that for almost four months of this child’s life she has had her own crib with a real mattress, clean clothes every day, someone to respond to her cries and no pains of hunger. All things thousands upon thousands of children will NEVER experience in Haiti and around the world.
A team of about 12 came yesterday for only one night as they left Haiti this morning after being in northern Haiti for the past week. They spent a portion of yesterday at the orphanage with the children. This morning at breakfast several from their team ended up sponsoring FIVE of the children as each had fallen totally in love with their selected child. Maybe we should post a sign upon arrival: BEWARE OF CHILDREN – YOU WILL LEAVE CHANGED (enter at your own risk.)
Oh how I have been recharged! I told the guys earlier the story of the Haitian man who came to the States and was wined and dined for a week and the night before he left he was having an exotic meal at a four star place and someone asked him if he was going to have trouble going back to Haiti where he would have nothing again. He responded that he was anxious to return, as there were too many things in the States that distracted him and got in the way of his Lord. Yes – there is something about being here that puts God back where He should be in your life. What joy, what peace.
Mid afternoon Renee and I went to visit Marie and the girls. Hoping to have a little party, we stopped at the only place we frequent when we are here and bought pizza, French fries and a cake with thick gooey frosting! Another stop for and orange drink and we were ready. Of course that only took about two hours to accomplish plus the oven broke at the restaurant and the three pizzas we ordered were all burnt, plus weren’t the expected size! I began to have a mini melt down and had to be reminded that I’m in Haiti – and that’s how we roll!
The girls were all waiting for us in a circle of chairs. I haven’t seen them in 6 mo. so was amazed at how much a few of them had grown. They enjoyed the “party” and literally licked their plates clean. Burnt pizza didn’t faze them in the least. They were more concerned about comparing the size of pizza they received to the girl next to them. Songs were sung, hugs were exchanged and as usual, it was difficult to say “good-bye.”
Renee and I are now back in our room exhausted – physically and mentally – Time to get rest and see what tomorrow will bring. Another emotional roller coaster ride, I suspect….
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